Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Why I Never Get Anything Done

Almost every time I sit down, Hobbes gets up in my lap.
My kids think it's unfair that he "loves you more than he loves any of us".
I believe it's because I have the largest lap with the most padding.

They say that having pets close by causes lower blood pressure numbers and eases stress. At this point, by blood pressure should be so low I should be dead. Either that, or I should be an oober relaxed heap of a human.

There's a saying that goes, "Dogs have masters, cats have staff". Unfortunately, it seems to be true. There's something about a cat in my lap that makes it unthinkable for me to wake him and put him down. Instead, I sit like a stone (so as to not disturb him) and wait for him to wake. If I happen to touch him, he begins purring like I'm his very best friend in the world. Such positive reinforcement makes dumping him on the floor even more impossible.

So, here I sit. As we speak. I have a cat on my lap. Maybe I'll get to get up and eat some breakfast sometime before lunch. Maybe not.


  1. I don't think his love for you is unfair at all. I think it is just as it should be. :-) Besides, you clearly understand the rules to the boss/staff relationship and you abide quite well by them.

  2. And you just thought he was YOUR office assistant. I notice how you've also sacrificed the use of a hand to assure his comfort. Hope the side effects of low bp and calm come to you for being such a good lap.

  3. It's nice to find another soul with really low bp and stress levels!!! My cat, Emma, can hear the quiet sound of my leaning back in the recliner from the bedroom when she's nestled on my unmade bed (left that way purposely so she can snuggle in it). The minute I lean back, she's out in the living room ready to jump on my newly formed "lap". I have to time my getting up with her...do you suppose our cats are related?

    Nancy in Iowa

  4. Oh, Carla. I SO relate to this post. Cats have a way of making you feel "blessed" that they've chosen your lap - and it's almost unthinkable to disturb them. Hobbes knows he's got you wrapped around his paw :) He's as smart as he is handsome.

  5. ...and cats know how to train their staff very well:))

  6. I love having a purring cat next to me. My cat sleeps on the bed, if I pet him during the night I get a long loving purr...so nice.


  7. Cee Cee-this is hilarious. I know what you mean. I won’t move my Janie at all. It’s so true about the staff though. I’m with you-if the blood pressure thing was true--I would have none :) LOL

  8. Danni, my kids continue to disagree on the love issue. They clearly don't understand the May/December romance idea. :)

    Leenie, I know, right? I had to type with one hand for a while until he gave that one back.

    Nancy, Hobbes follows me from room to room--much like the dogs (don't tell him I said that.) I suppose our cats could be related.

    Amy, we can only be grateful that the animals only lower the blood pressure, not make it go away completely. :)

    Hi Chook. I'm guessing you have at least one cat.

    Penny, That's it exactly--"Blessed"! I feel chosen. Special. That officially makes me staff.

    Sandra, he has me very, very well trained. I even open doors for him and make him meals (right on time!).

    Linda, my cat sleeps with us as well. He sometimes gets up near my head and starts purring in hopes of waking me up. Then he'll give me a tiny bite. I just tell him, "no biting" and we go back to sleep.

  9. At least he's the cutest thing ever!!

  10. :) He's adorable!!!! I wouldn't move either. :)

  11. We call or orange one "the parrot" as he likes to ride around on our shoulders...all the time...everywhere. Orange cats are weird

  12. I can totally see myself doing exactly the same. It's clear that he completely and totally loves his Mom. And that his Mom loves him. :)